cw: transphobia and everything else that's going to hell in the u.s.

so, i, somehow, got a job in dublin. tbh, i didn't think it would actually happen. i've vaguely tried getting a job outside the u.s. for a few years at this point. by that i mean i'd occassionally apply to a couple job openings, have all of those applications instantly rejected (probably due to me needing a visa), then give up. this time, i actually made it to the recruiter screening, then through an async coding challenge and five (5!!) interviews, then finally got a call letting me know i'd got the job right before i walked into the build-a-bear in the empire state building.

my new role is "technical lead 2" which is pretty much exactly what i've been doing at my current job but still feels like a step up. my current role is "senior software engineer", however at my current workplace, senior software engineers also do some technical leading (or, mostly do technical leading). i'll be responsible for an entire team now instead of individual projects, and i'm super excited about that.

but back to the dublin thing. i'm unbelievably excited to be moving. i'm also deeply sad, and disappointed, and alienated, and countless other emotions. as both someone who's had a dream to immigrate since like, 2014, and also a trans woman in the u.s. in the year of our lord 2025, this is pretty much the perfect time to gtfo. frankly, these last 4 months have been scary as shit. since jan 20, the rights of transgender people have been being stripped away, with attempts to ban life saving healthcare for youth and medicaid/tricare recipients, a ban on transgender people in the military, and making it more difficult for trans people to leave the country by issuing inaccurate passports in the best case and outright denying passports in the worst case.

i deserve better than this. i shouldn't have to leave my home to ensure my safety and well-being, or maintain my access to healthcare, or to receive even a modicum of respect and empathy from my neighbors. my support circle is fairly curated — i've long released myself of maintaining any relationship with someone who supports transphobic policy (either directly or indirectly through supporting politicians that sponsor transphobic policy) — but even with my personal boundaries i can't deny the reality that a significant portion of people in the u.s., even some who claim to love or care about me, would rather see people like me be miserable at best or dead at worst than see us... what? live happy, fulfilling lives? and even in the cases where they tolerate us, we're often one of the first to be sacrificed for whatever cause they think is more important.

i should land in dublin in early may. until then, i'll be busy packing up my life and shipping it across the atlantic ocean. after then, i'll be continuing to fight for all marginalized people, no matter which continent they're on.